I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
