Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
