I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
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