I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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