this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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