I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
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