i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
