saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
