I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Randomize
