didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
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