Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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