He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
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