why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize