I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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