Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
