with your own penis?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
