You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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