Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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