hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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