Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
