Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Randomize
