Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Randomize
