I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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