we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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