I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Randomize