he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I just found a bag of teeth...
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Randomize