Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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