Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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