She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize