the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
