Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize