Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
