how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
