Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
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