i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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