chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
