Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
