How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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