We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
