just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
My pussy is not your playground.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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