I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
