i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
