Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
