Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
