If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize