i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
