can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
