I don't usually arrange sex via text message
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
