Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
They have beer where we have blood.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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