And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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