Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
